Women Joke: 16
| Q: What is the difference between a single 40-year-old
woman and a single 40-year-old man? A: The 40-year-old woman thinks
often of having children and the man thinks often about dating them.
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|
Women Joke: 17
A group of guys and one girl are sitting together at a ball game.
During the game the guys notice the girl knew just as much
about the game as themselves, and are really impressed. After
the game they ask her, "How is it that you know so much
about baseball?"
She says, "Well, I used to be a guy and got a sex change."
The guys are amazed, but very curious about the process.
"What was the most painful part of the process? Was it when
they cut IT off?"
"That was very painful, but was not the most painful part."
"Was it when they cut off your balls?"
"That was very painful, but was not the most painful part."
"What was the most painful part?"
"The part that hurt the most was when they cut my salary in
half!"
Women Joke: 18
A WOMAN'S SCHEDULE
1. Get up.
2. Pee.
3. Drink raspberry-cranberry tea.
4. Pee.
5. Apply makeup. Pee first so you don't have to stop in the
middle.
6. Drive to work. Pee at gas station. Complain about dirty
restroom. Go to a different gas station and pee there.
7. Get to work at Burger King. Pee. Wash hands.
8. Lunch. Slimfast. Pee.
9. Arrive home. Pee. Shower. Pee.
10. Promise sex to husband. Pee. Get up in the middle of sex
and pee.
11. Pee. Go to bed. Get up at 3 A.M. waking husband but
instead of giving him head, go and pee.
Women Joke: 19
His And Hers ATMs
HIS:
1. Pull up to ATM
2. Insert card
3. Enter PIN number and account
4. Take cash, card and receipt
HER:
1. Pull up to ATM
2. Check makeup in rearview mirror
3. Shut off engine
4. Put keys in purse
5. Get out of car because you're too far from machine
6. Hunt for card in purse
7. Insert card
8. Hunt in purse for tampon wrapper with PIN number written
on it.
9. Enter PIN number
10. Study instructions for at least 2 minutes.
11. Hit "cancel"
12. Re-enter correct PIN number
13. Check balance
14. Look for envelope
15. Look in purse for pen
16. Make out deposit slip
17. Endorse checks
18. Make deposit
19. Study instructions
20. Make cash withdrawal
21. Get in car
22. Check makeup
23. Look for keys
24. Start car
25. Check makeup
26. Start pulling away
27. STOP
28. Back up to machine
29. Get out of car
30. Take card and receipt
31. Get back in car
32. Put card in wallet
33. Put receipt in checkbook
34. Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook
35. Clear area in purse for wallet and checkbook
36. Check makeup
37. Put car in reverse gear
38. Put car in drive
39. Drive away from machine
40. Travel 3 miles
41. Release parking brake
Women Joke: 20
Have you heard about the new orgasm pill just approved by the FDA for women?
It comes with a 16 inch applicator
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