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Women Joke: 131
| "Would you sleep with me for ten thousand dollars?" asked John
"Yes, I will." Paula replied.
"Would you do it for one thousand?" he asked.
"Well maybe, or maybe I'd do something else for you."
she answered with a wink.
"How about a blowjob for $20?" responded John.
"Hey! What kind of women do you think I am?" Paula snapped, indignantly.
"That's already been established, Paula. Now we're just haggling over the
price!"
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Women Joke: 132
Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that
you've been telling people that I'm ugly!" "Oh NO! I've just been saying
that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive." "I also heard that
you've been calling me fat?!?" "Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear
those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I've also heard
that you're saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!" "Oh NO! I only
said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"
Women Joke: 133
Answering Machine Recording:
"You have reached the breast self-examination hot line. Please press 1
now.......Now press the other one."
Women Joke: 134
Q: How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a
light bulb?
A: One. ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE?
Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a
light bulb. They don't even know the bulb is BURNED OUT.
They would sit in this house in the dark for THREE DAYS
before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it out they
wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that
they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past
SEVENTEEN YEARS. But if they did, by some miracle,
actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS LATER the chair that
they dragged from two rooms over to stand on to change the
STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND
UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER
THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?!
BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT
THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL
SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE
12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE
HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS...
I'm sorry...what did you ask me?
Women Joke: 135
Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says,
"I hear that you've been telling people that I'm ugly!"
"Oh NO! I've just been saying that your new hairdo makes you
look less attractive."
"I also heard that you've been calling me fat?!?"
"Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes
makes you look larger than you really are."
"I've also heard that you're saying that my husband has a wart
on his dick!"
"Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"
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