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Politics Joke: 111
| Two men were stopped by a TV newswoman doing street
interviews about the upcoming presidential primary election.
"I'm not voting for any of the candidates," the first man said. "I
don't know any of them."
"I feel the same way," the second man said. "Only I know
them all."
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Politics Joke: 112
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
1 U.S. leader
Politics Joke: 113
Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a physical, only to find out
that she's pregnant! She is furious. Here just became the senator of
New York and this has happened to her. She gets Bill on the phone and
immediately starts screaming: "How could you have let this happen?
With all that's going on right now, you go and get me pregnant! How
could you??!!! I can't believe this! I just found out I am five weeks
pregnant and it is all your fault!!! Your fault!!! Well, what have
you got to say???"
There is nothing but dead silence on the phone. She screams
again, "Did you hear me??!!" Finally she hears Bill's very, very
quiet voice. In a barely audible whisper, he says, "Who is this?"
Politics Joke: 114
More Jesse news...
Public Statement by the Rev. Jesse Jackson
Due to the great consternation caused by the revelation of my act of
procreation, I accept my obligation to give an explanation to the
population for my act of copulation. I gave in to temptation, for the
anticipation of sexual gratification, that I could not obtain through
masturbation, resulted in my fornication. I accepted her invitation,
and provided her with excitation, stimulation, penetration, replication,
and liberation. She provided lubrication (to avoid inflammation) and I
wore condoms to avoid contamination.
She cried for duplication but I insisted upon termination, in spite her
fascination with variation. This has caused me great aggravation, and
the agitation and provocation of the media has resulted in my humiliation,
denigration, and degradation. My wife is considering castration, which
would require my hospitalization.
Pray that this matter will find culmination in my sanctification and
rehabilitation so that my plans for nomination to my ultimate vocation
will not result in revocation and termination. I hope this proclamation
has provided illumination and verification and will prohibit further
provocation.
Sincerely,
The Rev. Jesse Jackson
Politics Joke: 115
George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife
Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order.
"I'll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil," answers the President.
"But sir, what about the mad cow?!!" asks the waiter.
"Oh," answers Dubya, "she'll order for herself."
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