Ouch Jokes

  The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing
 tour with a very rich African king who was a very important
 client. 
 The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary
 is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her,
 ...don't reject the guy outright. So, she tries to think of a way to
 dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her.
 So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you
 under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75-carat
 diamond ring with a matching 200-carat diamond tiara."
 The African king pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No
 problem!! I have. I have."
 Realizing her first condition was too easy the woman says to the man, "I
 want you to build me a 100-room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I
 want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France."
 The African king pauses for awhile. He whips out his cellular phone and
 calls some brokers in New York and in France. He looks at the woman, nods
 his head and says, "Okay, okay. I build. I build." 
 Realizing that she only has one last condition, the secretary knows that
 she'd better make this a good one. She takes her time to
 think and finally she gets an idea. A sure-to-work condition. She squints
 her eyes, looks at the man and says, rather coldly, "Since I like sex, I
 want the man I marry to have a 14-inch penis."
 The man seems a bit disturbed. He cups his face with his hands and rests
 his elbows on the table, all the while muttering in African
 dialect.
 Finally, after what seemed like forever, the king shakes his head, looking
 really sad, and says to the woman, "Okay, okay. I cut. I
 cut."