Ouch Jokes

      A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet
    rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over
    immediately.
    When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face
    close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard
    which is full and bushy.
    Are you the landlord?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both
    hands.
    "Actually, no" he replies. "Can you get him for me - I need to speak
    to him?" she asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his
    hair.
    "I'm afraid I can't" breathes the barman - clearly aroused. "Is there
    anything I can do?"
    "Yes there is. I need you to give him a message" she continues
    huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him
    to suck them gently.
    "Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room."