Music Joke: 6
| A drummer, tired of being ridiculed by his peers, decides to learn how
to play some "real" musical instruments. He goes to a music store,
walks in, approaches the store clerk, and says "I'll take that red trumpet over
there and that accordion." The store clerk looks at him a bit funny,
and replies "OK, you can have the fire extinguisher but the radiator's got
to stay".
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Music Joke: 7
There was this guy walking down the road when he noticed a night club
ahead. He went in, went up to the bar and asked for a drink. The bar owner,
who was tending bar, said, "I've never seen you in her before."
The guy says, "Yes, I'm not from around here. I'm just passing through on my
way to find a job."
The owner asks, "What do you do?"
The guy says, "I write music and play the piano."
The owner, looking excited says, "REALLY! I have an ad in the paper looking
for
someone to play my piano. Please sit down at the keyboard and play for me
if you're interested."
The guy does and as he plays the piano the owner is in awe of his talent
and musical abilities. The owner says, "You play the piano more beautifully
than anyone I have ever heard! What is the name of that song?"
The guy says, "I wrote that song and the name is Two Lesbians Fucking Their
Brains Out."
The owner gasps and is taken back. He says, "My gosh, that's a terrible name
for such a beautiful song. Do you know any others?"
The guy smiles and plays again. Once more the owner is astounded by this
guy's talent and musical abilities. He's almost afraid to ask but he does
ask what the name of the song he just played.
The guy answers, "I Fucked Her All Night Until She Couldn't Take Anymore."
The owner again was shocked. The owner says, "Ok, you play beautifully and
the songs you have written are incrediable. I will hire you, but you have
to promise not to tell the name of your songs to the patrons." The guy
agrees.
That night the guy was playing the piano and the crowd was just as amazed
as the owner was with this man's musical abilities. After playing two
songs the crowd stood up and applauded. The guy was really pleased and
stood up to take a bow. When he stood up and faced the audience, it was
apparent that his zipper was open and his dick and balls were hanging out.
One of the patrons close to the piano says, "Sir, do you know your dick and
balls are hanging out?"
The guy smiles and says, "KNOW IT, I WROTE IT!"
Music Joke: 8
A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of
a sudden he hears some music. No one is around, so he
starts searching for the source.
He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a
grave with a headstone that reads: Ludwig van Beethoven,
1770-1827. Then he realizes that the music is the Ninth
Symphony and it is being played backward! Puzzled, he
leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with
him.
By the time they arrive back at the grave, the music has
changed. This time it is the Seventh Symphony, but like the
previous piece, it is being played backward.
Curious, the men agree to consult a music scholar. When
they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing,
again backward. The expert notices that the symphonies are
being played in the reverse order in which they were
composed, the 9th, then the 7th, then the 5th.
By the next day the word has spread and a throng has
gathered around the grave. They are all listening to the
Second Symphony being played backward.
Just then the graveyard's caretaker ambles up to the group.
Someone in the crowd asks him if he has an explanation for
the music.
"Oh, it's nothing to worry about" says the caretaker. "He's
just decomposing!"
Music Joke: 9
Why are girls like pianos?
When they're not upright, they're grand...
Music Joke: 10
A certain young lady named Rowell
Had a musical bent to her bowel.
With a good plate of beans
Tucked under her jeans
She could play To a Wild Rose by MacDowell.
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