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Marriage Joke: 141
| This snow plow driver from North Dakota got married. He and his new
Bride prepared for their wedding nite. He watched for a while as she
spread three different kinds of creams and then a white foam in
preparation for their love making. She finally announced that she was
ready. The man then asked if she still had that string of pearls
necklace that he admired so much.
She replied, "Well, yes darling, I do. But what in the world would you
need it for at a time like this ?
He looked again at all her "preparations" and replied, "Ain't no way
I'm gonna try to go into a mess like that without chains."
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Marriage Joke: 142
Adjusting to marriage sometimes poses some unexpected problems. But
when I came upon a friend of mine in a bar the night after his
wedding, I had ask exactly what he was doing there instead of with his
new bride.
"Well, you see, this morning when I got up," he said, "I was barely
awake from a wonderful night of love-making. More out of habit than
anything else, I put a fifty dollar bill on the dresser."
I told him not to worry about it, that his new wife probably wouldn't
even think anything of it; that he could always say he left her some
spending money.
"No no !" he half wailed/half said, "You don't understand. She was
half asleep too and gave me $30 change."
Marriage Joke: 143
A coupla Aggies, Buck and Thurleen, married after graduating from
Texas A&M, are driving from Dallas down to a motel in Austin for their
honeymoon. Along the way, Buck reaches over and puts his hand on
Thurleen's knee.
Thurleen smiles, blushes and says, "Oh Buck, we're married now, you
can go farther than that!"
So he drove on to Laredo.
Marriage Joke: 144
A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that
they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert
himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we
wouldn't be here at all!"
The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only
would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would
there be any "we" in the first place."
Marriage Joke: 145
There were three guys in a bar. Two are talking about the amount of
control they have over their wives. The third remains silent. After a
while, one of the first two turned to the third and sez "Well... what
about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife ?"
"Well, on our honeymoon, I made damn sure my wife came to me on her
hands and knees." he bragged and took another sip of beer.
His friends were amazed ! "What happened then ?" they asked, almost in
unison.
"Well, then she said, 'Get the hell out from under that bed and fight
like a man !' " he admitted.
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