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Marriage Joke: 136
| It's a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are at the
zoo. She's wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress,
sleeveless w/straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in
front of a very large gorilla, the gorilla goes ape. He jumps up on
the bars, holding on w/one hand (and 2 feet), grunting and pounding
his chest w/the free hand. He is obviously excited at the pretty lady
in the sheer dress.
The husband, noticing the excitement, suggests that his wife tease the
poor fellow. He tells her to pucker her lips, wiggle her bottom, and
flirt w/the ape.
She does and the gorilla gets even more excited, making noises that
would wake the dead. Then the husband suggests that she let one of her
straps fall; she does, and the gorilla is so excited, he's just about
to tear the bars down.
The husband then suggests that the wife lift her dress up above the
thighs... this drives the gorilla absolutely crazy.
Then, quickly the husband grabs his wife by the hair, rips open the
door to the cage, slings her in w/the gorilla and says, "Now, tell him
you have a headache."
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Marriage Joke: 137
A bored woman says to her husband as she clasps her hands together,
"Guess what I have in here and you'll get some loving tonite."
The equally bored husband, wishing to avoid any kind of sex at all
replies, "An elephant".
The wife sez "That's close enough!"
Marriage Joke: 138
Tell ya what though, I don't have it nearly as rough as one of my
neighbors. When he attends a wife swapping party, he has to throw in
the maid, and a mistress to be named later.
Marriage Joke: 139
A young married woman was discussing her sex life with a girlfriend.
The girlfriend asked, "Do you talk to your husband when you're making
love ?"
She thought about it a minute then said, "Well, no. But I could. I
mean he has a cell phone and all now."
Marriage Joke: 140
I'm not saying that my wife was naive when we got married,
but... she thought "kinky sex" involved her wearing hair curlers to
bed.
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