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Marriage Joke: 101
| After insulting the female genie from the magic bottle, Carlos makes
his wish:
"To wake up with 3 women in my bed."
She says, "So be it!" and disappears back into the bottle.
The next morning, Carlos wakes up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding
and Hillary Clinton. His penis is gone, his leg is broken and he has
no health insurance.
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Marriage Joke: 102
It was their first date, and she'd shown the patience of a saint
as he babbled on and on about his hobbies, his pet peeves, his
driving techniques, and even the standards he used to choose
his barber.
Finally, he came up for air and said, "But enough about me.
Let's talk about you."
She breathed a sigh of relief.
He went on, "What do you think about me?"
Marriage Joke: 103
A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong
well after midnight when one of the players returned from
the bathroom with an urgent report.
"Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen
making love to your wife."
"OK, that's it, guys," Roger said. "This is positively
the last deal."
Marriage Joke: 104
Pappy sees Elmer walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya
going boy?"
The son smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting Peggy-Sue."
The Father said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no
dang lantern."
"Sure Pa, I know." the boy said. "And look what you got !"
Marriage Joke: 105
A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-
law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke
to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted
on them both trying to find her mother.
The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and
started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they
came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up
against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood
facing her.
The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"
"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into
this mess, let him get himself out of it."
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