|
Lawyer Joke: 21
| Attorney to witness: "What was the first thing your husband
said to you when he woke up that morning?"
Witness: "Where am I Cathy?"
Attorney: "And why did that upset you?"
Witness: "Because my name is Susan."
|
|
Lawyer Joke: 22
A lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble in
the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.
The farmer said, "There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for
two to sleep, one of you must sleep in the barn."
"No problem," spoke the Rabbi. "My people wandered in the desert for forty
years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for an evening." With that
he departed to the barn and the others bedded down for the night.
Moments later a knock was heard at the door. The farmer opened the door,
and there stood the Rabbi from the barn. "What's wrong?" asked the farmer.
He replied, "I am grateful to you, but I can't sleep in the barn. There is
a pig in the barn and my faith believes that is an unclean animal."
His Hindu friend agreed to swap places with him. But a few minutes late
the same scene occurs. There is a knock on the door. "What's wrong, now?"
the farmer asked.
The Hindu holy man replies, "I too am grateful for your helping us out, but
there is a cow in the barn and in my country cows are considered sacred. I
can't sleep on holy ground!"
Well, that leaves only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and
complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another
knock on the farmer's door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opened the
door, and there stood the pig and the cow.
Lawyer Joke: 23
An anxious woman goes to her doctor. "Doctor," she asks nervously, "can
you get pregnant from anal intercourse?"
"Certainly," replies the doctor, "Where do you think lawyers come from?"
Lawyer Joke: 24
Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this
case?
Juror: I don't want to be away from my job that long.
Judge: Can't they do without you at work?
Juror: Yes, but I don't want them to know it.
Lawyer Joke: 25
A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a
judge just as he was about to leave, and asked him to marry them. He
asked if they had a license and, when they didn't, sent them off to get
one.
They caught the town clerk just as he was locking up, and got the
license from him. When they got back to the judge, he pointed out they
had filled the names in backwards -- his where hers belonged and vice
versa. They rushed back to the clerk's office, caught him again, and got
another license.
This time, the judge noticed that the clerk had filled in the date in
the wrong format. Again they catch the clerk... After five reissued
licenses, the judge is finally satisfied.
Judge: "I hope you appreciate why I made you keep going back. If there
are irregularities in the license, your marriage would not be legal, and
any children you might have would be technical bastards."
Groom: "That's funny - that's just what the clerk called you."
< < Prev
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
Next > >
|
|
