Lawyer Jokes

     One evening after attending a concert, two men were walking down the
    road when they
    saw a well-dressed and attractive looking woman walking ahead of them.
    One of the men
    turned to the other and said, "I'd give 50 bucks to spend the night
    with her." To their
    surprise the woman overheard the remark. Turning round she said, "I'll
    take you up on
    that." She had good appearance and a nice body, so after bidding his
    companion 'good
    night', he followed her back to her apartment and they went straight
    to bed. The following
    morning the man presented her with 25.00. She demanded the rest of her
    money."If you
    don't give me the remaining $25 I'll sue you for it." He laughed,
    saying, "I'd like to see
    you get it on those grounds!" The next day,he was surprised to receive
    a summons
    ordering his appearance in Court as Defendant in a lawsuit. He rushed
    to his atorney and
    explained the circumstances to him. His atorney said, "She can't
    possibly get a judgment
    against you on such grounds, but it would interesting to see how her
    case will be
    presented." After the usual preliminaries, her lawyer addressed the
    court as follows:-
    Your honor, my client this lady here is the owner of a fine piece of
    property, a garden spot
    surrounded by a profuse of luscious shrubbery, which she agreed to
    rent to the Defendant
    for a specified length of time, for an agreed upon sum of $50. The
    Defendant took
    possession of the property, used it extensively for the purpose for
    which it was rented, but
    upon evacuation of the premises he paid only $25; half the agreed
    amount. The rent was by
    no means excessive, even though it was restricted property, and we ask
    Judgment be
    granted against Defendant to ensure payment of the balance.The
    Defendant's lawyer was
    impressed and amused at the way his opponent had presented the case.
    His defense was,
    therefore, somewhat altered from the way he had originally planned to
    present it.
    Your Honor, my client agrees the young lady has a fine piece of
    property,that he did rent
    such property for a time, and a degree of pleasure was derived from
    the transaction.
    However, my client found a well on the property around which he placed
    his stones,
    erected a pump, and sunk a shaft, all labor being performed by him
    personally. We claim
    these improvements to the property were sufficient to offset the
    unpaid amount and that the
    plaintiff was more than adequately satisfied and compensated for the
    rental of the said
    property. We therefore ask Judgment not be granted.
    The young lady's lawyer's comeback was this:- Your Honor, my client
    agrees that the
    Defendant did find a well on her property and that he did make
    improvements such as my
    opponent has described. However had the Defendant not known the well
    existed, he would
    not have rented the property. Also, upon evacuating the premises, the
    Defendant removed
    his stones, pulled out his shaft and took the pump with him. In so
    doing, he not only
    dragged his equipment through the shrubbery, leaving my client to do
    the cleaning up, but
    he left the hole much larger than it was prior to his occupancy, thus
    making it very easily
    accessible to little children. We therefore ask that Judgment be
    granted.
    SHE GOT IT!