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FoodDrink Joke: 1
Wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water?

Try spelling Evian backwards. NAIVE

FoodDrink Joke: 2
A homeless man walks into a diner with enough change for a cup of coffee. Seated next to him at the counter, was a well-dressed man with a bowl of chili in front of him. A few minutes later, finishing his cup of coffee, the homeless man begins to notice that the stranger next to him is not eating his chili, but rather just staring at it, looking confused and disoriented. Not having eaten in two days, the homeless man asks the stranger: "Sir, I'm cold and hungry and haven't eaten in days. If you're not going to eat your chili, do you mind if I have it?" With little acknowledgement, the stranger simply shoves the bowl in his direction. Minutes later, the homeless man, having nearly finished the entire bowl of chili, discovers, in the bottom of the bowl - a small pile of dog turds. Immediately, the homeless man becomes sick and vomits the chili back into the bowl. Finally, the stranger seated next to him turned to him and said "I know how you feel, buddy. That's about as far as I got, too."

FoodDrink Joke: 3
A German tourist walks into a McDonald's in New York City and orders a beer. (In Germany and many parts of Europe, McDonald's actually does serve beer.) The local guy in the line behind him immediately gives him the jab: "They don't serve BEER here, you MORON!" The German fellow felt pretty stupid, but suddenly turns to the New Yorker with a surprised look, and begins to chuckle.

"And what's so funny?!?" the New Yorker demands.

"Oh, nothing really, I just realized that you came here for the food."

FoodDrink Joke: 4
At a dinner party, one of the guests, an obnoxiously loud young man, tried to make clever remarks about everyone and everything.

When he was served a piece of meat, he picked it up with his fork, held it up and smirked: 'Is this pig?'

Another guest, sitting opposite, asked quietly: 'Which end of the fork are you referring to?'

FoodDrink Joke: 5
Q: Why is having a wank like eating McDonald's? A: Because it's always exactly the same and afterwards you .swear you'll never do it again.

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