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Drunks Joke: 21
| A pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digested,
then suddenly a whiskey came along. Pizza thought:"Ok.
I'll let him pass, there's no hurry. Two minutes later
another whiskey comes by and pizza let him pass too, but
two minutes later when the next one got there, pizza stoped
him:"What's going on out there?" it asked. "Why, there's a
party going on!! It's great! They're having the most fun!!"
the whiskey replied.
And pizza said: "Great, I'll go check it out!"
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Drunks Joke: 22
One day, a Smartie and a Polo were having a drink in the pub.
Suddenly the pub door swings open and in walks a Humbug.
“Fuck me” shouts Polo, and immediately dives under the table.
“What the fuck are you doing that for?” says Smartie.
“That humbug always gives me a right good kicking whenever I see
him, so I’m hiding from him” says Polo.
“You should stand up to him” says Smartie. “He’ll respect you more
if you do”
Sure enough, the humbug walks over and gives the Polo a right slap.
“Fuck off you stripy wanker, or I’ll knock the fucking shit out of
you” says Polo.
“Hey, no problem man, can I buy you a drink” says Humbug.
“Told you so” says Smartie.
The next night Polo and Smartie are sitting in the pub again, when in
walks Humbug with his mate, Tune.
“Fuck me” shouts Polo again diving under the table.
“What the fuck are you doing that for again” says Smartie.
“I know you said stand up to bullies, but thats Tune” says Polo.
“So what?” says Smartie.
“He’s fucking menthol” says Polo.
sent by Steve Butler
Drunks Joke: 23
The scene was Mount Olympus, where Bacchus, the Greek
god of wine, had thrown a party for a pair of visiting Roman
deities -- Ceres, the goddess of agriculture, and Janus, the two-
faced god of doors and beginnings. Everyone overdid it, more or
less. Ceres at one point was staggering and turning in circles;
Janus, equally submerged, was trying to dance with her.
Bacchus feared that the pair might fall over, so he went to
steady them. .... This marked the first time that a whirled Ceres
was held with a double-header.
Drunks Joke: 24
"Shhaaayyy, buddy, what's a 'Breathalyzer'?" asked one drunk
to his friend at the next barstool.
"Well, I'd have to say it's a bag that tells you when you've drunk
way too much," answered the equally wasted gent.
"Ah hell, whaddya know? I've been married to one of those for
years and years now!"
Drunks Joke: 25
A driver, obviously drunk, was heading the wrong way down
a one-way street when a policeman pulled him over. "Didn't
you see the arrow, buddy?" he asked.
"An arrow?" the confused driver said. "I didn't even see the
Indians
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